snow please go away

So, I figured I should give a few updates in my life.

First and foremost I would like you all to know that I am oficially a freak. I know my family and close friends will say that they have known this all along but it has been confirmed by a doctor. The story behind this is kind of long but let me give you a brief synopsis... I go to the doctor for a swollen and painful foot from playing soccer-I figured a week of suffering was enough. The Dr. does a few X-rays and an ultrasound-yes, like they use for babies. They have no idea what is wrong with my foot. Shortly thereafter I am joined by two more doctors all looking at me, poking me, and asking me questions. Eventually they get distracted by the fact that apparently my left leg is significantly longer than my right one, something that somehow no one has ever noticed before. So then the doctors (3 of them) start popping me and stretching me in ways I never thought possible by any who are not contortionists by profession. So then I am told I need to go get more X-rays that will measure my tipia and femur on each leg and if the difference is bad enough I will have to get lifts in my shoes-ah! So I leave the doctor with MAJOR 90 year old arthritic woman back pain (from all the popping and adjusting) and as I am leaving I say, ok so what should I do about my foot? The doctors had gotten totally side-tracked and now my foot problem is still a mystery until I go back after break...funny story huh? I think so.

In other news, my intramural soccer team won the championships-there were 17 teams in our division so it is a pretty tough thing to win and I have been eyeing that free T-shirt all year long...



In other news, you may or may not now that I bought a new car! I never blogged about this because I don't want to sound braggy but I bought a new car about a month ago and I love it! It is a black 08 Hyundai Elantra. Here is a picture of the car that I took from google:



Also, I would once again like to remind you all how much I HATE the snow and the cold and the ice. I seriously cannot get warm! But in happier news I will be in Florida in just a few short days!! Ahh I love Florida, family, and Christmas! Yay! I probably won't be blogging again before I go so I hope you all have a happy, safe, and fun Christmas!

A Christmas Song I Love

I'm sure you have all heard this song before as it has been re-done by several popular artists. I love this song so much. The words express how I feel, how I just want everything to be OK for even just one day. I know opposition is part of the plan, but it is so hard to see people suffer. I think that we can all help alleviate some of the hurt in the world, even in just a small way, as we strive to be a friend and serve others. Anyway, here are the lyrics. Merry Christmas!

Grown-Up Christmas List

Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee;
I wrote to you
With childhood fantasies.

Well, I'm all grown-up now,
And still need help somehow.
I'm not a child,
But my heart still can dream.

So here's my lifelong wish,
My grown-up christmas list.
Not for myself,
But for a world in need.

No more lives torn apart,
That wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
And everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end.
This is my grown-up christmas list.

As children we believed
The grandest sight to see
Was something lovely
Wrapped beneath our tree.

Well heaven surely knows
That packages and bows
Can never heal
A hurting human soul.

No more lives torn apart,
That wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
And everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end.
This is my grown-up christmas list.

What is this illusion called the innocence of youth?
Maybe only in our blind belief can we ever find the truth.


No more lives torn apart,
That wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
And everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end, oh.
This is my grown-up christmas list.

This is my grown-up christmas list.

I Never Thought I Would Say This

I know you all will think I am crazy (especially Melani) but just hear me out. Having a job where you basically do nothing will slowly drive you in sane. I love my job and I am grateful to have a job but I must say, I have way too much time on my hands. I try to be productive but even when I spend hours cleaning, running errands, and doing other such tasks I am still left with a LOT of free time at home and at work. During the weekends I generally stay busy because there is usually something going on but during the week-which is when my days off are- everyone is busy with school and not too much fun happens. I have watched more T.V. in the past 3 months than I have in the last 3 years combined.
During school, I would be gone for 12 hours a day most days. I enjoy being busy and working hard. Of course I would get worn out and count the days till the weekends but I really enjoyed it. I hate how lazy I feel now days, even though I am still really involved with a lot of things. It's just the fact that I have free time at work too and so that is 8 extra hours a day that normal people don't have. I know a lot of you think you would kill for all this extra time but it gets lonely and boring-especially when you don't have a whole lot of other obligations like kids and a family. I guess I can only watch so much TV and do so many projects before I want to go crazy. And now that it is cold I am much less inclined to go outdoors which is what I love to do when I have free time. But before I sound ungrateful and complain-y, let me tell you about my Tuesday shift, which is why I love the days so much more than the nights:

1) I got to work and ate breakfast and read the newspaper while supervising the kids' morning chores.
2) Went on a field trip with the kids to a medical place that took a few hours
3) Came back and did a bit of paperwork
4) Went outside for P.E. and played volleyball, basketball, and soccer
5) We had lunch time which I don't get a break for but I get free food and just supervise the kiddos
6) I typed some paperwork up
7) Hung out with the kids after school before going home

Basically it was a fun day- not stressful like most jobs, but not boring like the night shifts....It was absolutely a great day and this is one reason that I stay at my job-for the contact shifts. If I could have those shifts 5 days a week it would be heaven but sadly there may not be openings for years...

Bored?

If you ever need a good cry, check out this blog- ryandsteph.blogspot.com I stumbled upon it one night (through a friend of a friend) and I was so touched. It is an amazing story and the parents are just so optimistic and hopeful. I know you are all busy and there is a lot to read but seriously check it out.

I am Thankful, Yes I am

In my anticipation of Christmas I did not mean to overlook Thanksgiving. I love Thanksgiving a lot, and although I cannot be home this year, I am actually very excited I get to work that day. I am thrilled to have a day of work to just hang out with the kids- no school, no community service,no sleeping. If they are well behaved it should be a fun day with food, football, and games. I wanted to post something Thanksgiving-ish but listing all the things I am thankful for would be never ending, and many of those things are quite obvious anyway. So, I am going to write the 5 things I am most grateful for that have happened in the last 5 years, or basically the 5 biggest blessings in my life. The last 5 years have been full of changes as I moved out on my own. And here are the top five blessings that come to mind at this wee hour of the night:

1)Graduating from High School- being able to get an education is such a blessing that we often take for granted. High School was a lot of fun but I don't think I would ever want to relive it... in fact I know I wouldn't.
2) Moving out to school. This is pretty much all encompassing as so many things have come directly from this- my great wards, bishoprics, my old job, roommates, friends, intramurals, a certain boy, getting an education that opened my eyes to the world, learning to be my own person, learning what is really important in life, learning how to survive on as little sleep as possible, etc...
3) All of my nieces and nephews were born within the last 5 years except for one who is a bit older than that, but I am of course including him too and the little one on the way. These little dudes and gals are my most favorite people. They are so cute and I miss them. I pray daily in gratitude for them being in my life.
4) Becoming closer to family, thanks to amazing technology and also moving near a great cousin who takes care of me and makes sure I have a place to spend the holidays.
5) Graduating from college- I really didn't expect to make it. School was harder than I ever dreamed. I was pushed to the limits many-a-times but somehow I was guided through it. I love my major and the job it has led me to.

These are just some of the things that come to mind. I hope everyone has a yummy Thanksgiving and eats everything in site. Seriously don't hold back, or I will come steal your food.

Tradition, Tradition!!

As we all know, the holiday season is swiftly approaching and I thought it would be fun to list some of my family's traditions. I'm sure I will not get them all but here are some that come to mind...beware this is kind of long:

Christmas Countdown Chain: This is one of my favorite traditions and even when I was the only kid at home I made my parents continue this on. We make a countdown chain for December 1st through December 25th with a specific color paper for each person. So instead of the chain being 25 links long it was 7x that. Each person knew their color for that season and had a specific "task" to do each day. The chores were on a rotating pattern. This was a very systematic chain and making it took a lot of brain power...seriously I think my mom was the only one who ever totally understood how to make it. The tasks we did were anything from lighting candles, making a Christmas goodie, wrapping a present, reading a Christmas story, doing service, to moving the star on the countdown calendar. It was a great way to not only countdown the days till Christmas but also to feel the Christmas spirit and get some Holiday tasks accomplished. I sure do miss this!

Candles: As I mentioned above with the lighting candles, we would light candles at dinner time, every day throughout the month. The last night (Christmas Eve) the candles are lit and you have to be in bed and asleep before they burn out or else Santa Claus cannot come. It always stressed me out as a kid trying to fall asleep because I was way too excited! This too had a system as you had to burn just the right amount off of the candles each night to have the perfect amount left for Christmas Eve.

Caroling: We usually go caroling sometime during the month, sometimes on Christmas Eve. We always make up plates of goodies to take. We usually go caroling to the families my parents home/visit teach. We also go to neighbors, less active church members, and widows. It is always a little embarrassing because I don't think we have the best signing voices but it is a fun way to do a little service for others.

The Nativity Story: Every year, like many families we dress up in makeshift costumes of towels and sheets and reenact the nativity story as someone reads from Luke 2. When I was a baby I played baby Jesus but when I got older I always wanted to be Mary or the Angel. My puppy Mollie was the ever faithful sheep for whoever played the sheperd. I also made my parents keep this tradition up even after my brothers were all gone.
We also added another reenactment of the nativity to our tradition ever since my freshman year in seminary when my teacher put on this activity (Bless Sister Sorenson's heart, she died of Cancer a few years ago but was the BEST teacher ever). Anyway, the presentation she did was as follows: You put each piece from a nativity set into a brown paper bag with a number on it (each in a separate bag). In each bag is a story or scripture and a song that corresponds to the character in the bag. After you read your paper, everyone sings the song and you add your nativity piece to the stable. The last piece is baby Jesus and after he is placed in the scene you turn on a light or have a light rigged (flashlights work well) so that it shines directly on the newborn Savior as you sing the final song which I believe is Silent Night. Oh I get the chills just thinking about it.

Gifts: After acting out the nativity we usually were allowed to open one small gift on Christmas Eve. I loved this because I could hardly wait until Christmas Day and this helped me survive the suspense. Also, on Christmas Day, my parents...I mean Santa... always left a few gifts out and unwrapped by the stockings. This was to show that Santa had in all actuality come the night before. It also helped if presents were big because then they didn't have to be wrapped.

Wake-Up Call: I don't know if this is a tradition or what but I always wake up super early from anticipation and wake everyone up to open presents. Even now I cannot stand the excitement. As I have grown older it is not the presents that thrill me as much as the feeling-it is the most wonderful day of all. I just love staying in my jammies all day, sipping hot co-coa to holiday tunes by the fire, and eating delicious food and candy all day. I cannot think of much else to set the mood like that.

These are a few of the main things I remember about Christmas at home. We don't do all of these anymore but try to do as many as we can. It just isn't possible to do the countdown chain when we are all in different states. I love Christmas for many reasons and traditions help make the season what it is. The most important tradition however if remembering the reason we are celebrating in the first place. I love my Savior and am grateful for His humble birth, His perfect life, and His victorious death.

And now I am curious...what traditions do you have?

I Can Take the Heat Mandi

Well I am bored at work and Mandi tagged anybody who can take the heat so I guess I will give it a shot...

8 T.V. shows I like to watch
1. LOST
2. The Office
3. Gangland on the History Channel or any other crime tv show
4. John and Kate Plus 8
5. I'm sad to admit but I enjoy Paris Hilton's My New BFF
6. BASEBALL and other sports
7. Friends
8. The old Classics (Full House, Fresh Prince, etc...)


8 Things that happened yesterday
1. Worked
2. Slept
3. Attempted to clean the bathroom when low and behold...
4. Our water was shut off at my apartment complex so I couldn't finish it or shower for a while
5. Showered at my friend's apartment so I could finally get clean
6. Waited for my friend to try on 9 outfits before deciding what to wear.
7. Went out to dinner with some fabulous friends
8. Played Clue with the same fabulous friends


8 places I like to eat
1. Olive Garden
2. Zupas
3. St. Louis Bread Co. AKA Panera Bread Co.
4. Cafe Rio/Costa Vida
5. Home-as in at my parents house!
6. Open Seasame (It's a Chinese resaurant in Canada)
7. Brick Oven
8. TUCANOS!

8 Things I am looking forward to
1. Thanksgiving
2. Christmas
3. Being in Florida for Christmas, being with my family
4. Someday working normal hours again
5. January 23rd- a very happy day
6. Getting married and having a family some day
7. Some day going to Africa
8. Going on a mission with my husband when I am old

8 Things on my wish list
1. a day job but at a place as fabulous as the one I am at
2. warm weather all year long
3. Go to Africa
4. Go to Bora Bora
5. to live closer to my family
6. to get two new roommates- and no, one of them is not to replace Melani
7. Get married and have a family
8. That selfish/mean/bad people would not exist

In Memory

Well I am a little hesitant to post today because I am not doing so for sympathy. I do however want to post in memory of someone very dear to me, my brother Nathan. Today marks the 11th year anniversary of his death. I choose to use this day to honor and remember the life he had. I am going to list some of my favorite memories. Most of you who read my blog did not know my brother so now you can learn a bit:

1) His favorite hymn was Battle Hymn of the Republic-not sure why but I think it is funny
2) His FHE lessons were always intricate Jeopardy games or practice fire drills. The one I remember most was learning how to use a fire extinguisher to put out fire and standing in my front yard spraying down fires. Who says FHE isn't fun?
3)One Halloween he wore my mom's clothes to school to dress up as a women. Let's just say my parents were slightly embarrassed.
4) He loved Nirvana, and Oasis and to my mom's delight, the Grassroots
5) He played Piano, Guitar, and Alto Sax-one time he left his saxophone in the drive-way while waiting for the bus and my dad backed over it on his way to work. The worst part was Nathan had a concert that day...oops!
6) He taught me how to build/shoot off rockets and shoot guns
7) He worked as a bagger at the local IGA and when he asked my friend's mom if she needed help out to the car she said something (I cant remember what) and he picked up her son and carried him out even though he was my age (10 or 11) and totally capable of walking-he was just a goof
8) When he was little he had to wear a pirate patch because of his lazy eye but he would always take it off when he left the house
9) He, Valerie and I used to play a game called Tornado where we would go out in the ditches and pretend tornados were coming and hide or something, I can't really remember-oh the life of a farm kid
10) He was an engineer and was always building/inventing things-he and my dad built a storage shed in our back yard
11) He was an electrician- he made a doorbell for his room and all sorts of other gizmos. He even helped wire our house after it was built.
12) He probably teased me the most out of my three brothers but also spent the most time with Val and I. He was always hugging on my mom and would sit on my parent's lap from time to time.

Well that is some of the stuff that comes to mind right now. I recently made a similar list in my journal but it has a lot more to it probably.

"We're all of us stars
We're fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see us some day
Just take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out"
-Oasis-

Oh the Irony

While most of you are relishing this fine eve of an extra hour of sleep, I am here basking in the joy of an extra hour of work. I am dreading that hour when the clock strikes back an hour and I feel like an hour was spent in vain. It's going to be odd experiencing daylight savings from this perspective but hopefully the time will not pass too slowly.

Are you serious?

It snowed yesterday... and it's only October 12th!! What in the heck?! Luckily the snow didn't stick but it is still freezing! All of my family is living it up with 60 or 70 degree weather. No fair. I was not made for the cold. Okay, I am done complaining now, and it is supposed to warm up by the end of the week.

Shoes and Shirt...no problem

So with the economic crisis that is occurring, I have become super frugal. I am trying not to spend money on anything to the point that it is almost ridiculous. I am fine financially, better than ever actually, but I am saving up for a new car and possibly grad school in January. I am worried about the economy and am trying not to spend money and so far have been really good. Plus, with how little space I have in my apartment, and all the crap I already own, I really do not need more stuff. But, I messed it all up on Wednesday when I stumbled upon these shoes and HAD to have them. They were a pretty good deal and they had free shipping but I am mad at myself for buying them. I will just have to see how much I love them in person and if I don't I can always send them back. I am excited though because I love comfy shoes that I can wear in the nasty cold here.

Oh and on a more exciting note, I was at the women's soccer game tonight and won a free shirt! Now I thought it would just be a ginormous tee shirt with a weird logo that I would just give away but it was actually a cute shirt from Shade Clothing. It was even my size and was valued at $21.50. Not bad eh?! I am excited. I tried to find a picture to post of it but there weren't any on their website...all I can say is I am going to every game that is left so I can win more!

Can You Feel Real Like You Are?

Ok the title for this blog is taken from a new Goo Goo Dolls song titled "Real." This post has nothing to do with that but I just like it. I love the Goo Goo Dolls so much, probably because they have been around my whole life and they are just fabulous musicians. Check out this song because I love it. On the subject of music, I was thinking today about all my favorite songs and about 99% of them are sung by guys. No offense to anyone who sings but I just prefer men's voices to women's voices most of the time. Even if the woman is on key and everything I just don't like high pitches very much. There are a lot of talented female singers and I do admire them because I sure can't sing like that, but I just love guy singers more.

I was also thinking today about how I am a germ-a-phobe. I know I definitely get this from my mom. I thought of this because I am at work and I wanted to eat some ice cream (because all I do all night is stuff my face) and there were no plastic spoons left. There were however, some of the utensil's that the kids use but they hand wash them. Ok eating off of dishes that teenage boys wash by hand just does not thrill me. So what did I do at this time of great crisis? I ate my ice cream with a plastic fork. :) The first fork I tried broke so I had to get another one. I know I probably won't die or even get sick but I just am paranoid about certain things like that. If I really need to I just suck it up and do it and I am fine, but for the most part I have some weird phobias that make me do some odd things. Here are a few:

1) Pretty much no matter where I am I will not sit on a public toilet, I hover. If I must sit? I line that seat with a liner or some TP.
2) I flush public toilets with my feet.
3) I don't like eating or drinking after certain people. Close friends or family are fine but I will not just share with anyone. I am not worried about getting sick. It's more the thought of their saliva that creeps me out.
4) Every time I eat at restaurant, especially fast food I think about all the horrible things that could have happened to my food in the kitchen (dropped on floor, sneezed on, touched with bare hands, etc...) - some call me crazy but keep in mind I worked in the "food business" for 3 years and that is just what happens, but I get over it and usually enjoy my food
5) I hate hair! -especially if it is dark, and even more so if it is wet. I know hair can't really hurt you but it seriously is so creepy to me, and if I ever have hair in my food, please just shoot me! Hair literally gives me the chills.
6) I rarely trust a dish that has not been cleaned in the dishwasher. I know it may not matter, but I just don't really believe most people wash dishes by hand in a very sanitary manner.
7) Occasionally I do that weird thing where I touch a part of a door that I feel like nobody has touched if I am somewhere really nasty like a public restroom in the South. Seriously, driving from NC to Florida has got to be the worst as far as bathroom breaks go.

I was watching John and Kate Plus 8 and she said something that is so true for me...she is more creeped out by people germs than nature germs. That is how I am. I will eat off of a sidewalk before a floor any day. I don't know why but that is just how my mind works....anyway, my randomness is done for now. Can you tell I get bored at work? Enjoy conference tomorrow everyone!

Nick-Names

I thought it would be fun to list all of the nick-names I have been given throughout my life. I have never been a huge fan of my own name so I enjoy hearing nick-names people make up for me. It seems like everyone's always making up new names for me, and I am bored at work so I am going to list the one's I can think of just for fun.

J-Bear- my dad has called me this as long as I can remember
Marie-zee- my dad has called me this on occassion but not as much as the first one
Wash Belly- it's something my cousing learned when he went to Jamacia on his mission-it's what they call the youngest child there- my dad calls me this
Caboose- my dad calls me this because I am the youngest- I used to get so mad about this one
Jaynet- my cousin always calls me this, although it might be due more to a southern accent than anything else. My mum and my sister also call me this and occassionally one of my brothers does.
Jay- my friends in elementry school called me this and I thought I was sooo cool
J-dog or J-dawg- friends have called me this on and off most of my life
Chewbaca or Chewy- my high school soccer coach and teammates called me this but I never understood why
Jinganinget- some family friends did this weird thing where they put an ing after the consonants when they spoke. My sister calls me this from time to time.
Fairy- my friend Jamie started calling me this after one basketball practice where they noticed that I run funny (Apparantly I run like a girl-but it hurts my shoulders to run with my arms down by my waist...)
Jannernet- my friends from freshman year of college always call me this, I don't really know why
Schmanet- my friend Travis always puts a schm in front of everyone's names
Jan-nut- my friend Kristen calls me this
J-Bo-(like J-Lo)Garrett always calls me this
Janay or Young Janay- Mandi and Melani used to call me this
Junet-my newphew invented a language called Joshua German where he puts a U in every word
June-my friend Melani calls me this, it's basically short for Junet
Janis/Jannett/Janna- half the time friends call me this jokingly but sometimes people think this is really my name

Currently Reading

So as most of you know, I have a LOT of time on my hands now days which is quite nice most of the time. Today I was thinking about all of the books I am currently reading and I was surprised by how many it is. I guess I am sort of ADD when it comes to books so I am always reading at least 2 at a time. But I think think this is a record for me.....

The Great Gatsby: I read this in high school but found it at work and wanted to read it again because I couldn't remember much of it but I remember enjoying it.

The Twilight Series: #2 New Moon I know what you are all thinking....I really hate fantasy/sci-fi because I have zero imagination. I never desired to read these books because they seemed so weird. My friends at my old job bought me the first one and said I had to read it because I was always saying how I never would. Well I read Twilight at work and it was actually pretty good. The author's style bugs me a lot but other times I really enjoy the way she writes. Overall the books are good so far and I want to finish the series and also see the movies.

The Book of Mormon: This is kind of a constant read thing as I am sure it is for a lot of you. I am almost through Alma (I know I am a little behind the Sunday School Schedule) but as always I learn some new insights every time.

Trusting Jesus: MY FAVORITE BOOK! I am almost done reading it for the second or third time and I just love it. Elder Holland is amazing and this book makes me feel so good about life! READ IT!

A Child Called It: I have read this one before too but stumbled upon it at work and decided to read it again because I never read the others in the series and want to read them all. Very simple read but hard to learn of all the crap this kid went through.

God Wants A Powerful People: This is a Sheri Dew book. It is pretty good and helps me feel motivated to do good things. I will be honest, her writing style bugs me from time to time. I am kind of picky but overall the ideas she presents are good.

Where the Sidewalk Ends: This has always been my favorite poetry book. My sister sent me a package a few months ago with this book. I love to just sit down and read all the fun poems. I am about halfway through reading from cover to cover.

And one I finished about a month and a half ago but cannot fail to mention is The Kite Runner. I could not put it down! I still haven't seen the movie but the book is fabulous. Another favorite that I read this summer was The Screw Tape Letters by C.S. Lewis. It was my first Lewis book and I loved his thought processes and style. He is an ingenious writer. As you tell I love to read but even more so I have a passion for writing so I am constantly critiquing everything I read. If anyone has any great books let me know!

Life of Mine

I wanted to update my blog but then again, there is not a whole lot to report. I just completed 3 days of training for work where I learned all about de-escalating potentially violent situations. I learned how to do this using verbal as well as physical tactics. I am now capable of taking down a 300 pound man-I did it! But, hopefully I won't ever have to do this. I also had the "opportunity" to be hand-cuffed as well as learn how to hand-cuff others. Luckily for me we rarely have to deal with these types of situations. Over all the training was pretty interesting, I just got bored of hearing the same old man speak for 8 hours a day, 3 days straight. I met some fun people at the training and got to learn about some of the other facilities in the area.

I am LOVING the amazing September weather lately. The days are warm and sunny and the nights haven't been too cold. I am however, DREADING winter. I went to two bonfires this weekend and had a great time at both. My intramurals started back up this week and I am excited. We won our soccer game and our basketball game. I just love playing competitive sports but also enjoy the fact that they are really just for fun. I play with some great people and we have a good time.

Oh and on a finishing note...

General Conference is in 2 weeks!

Quote

A friend of mine had this quote posted on his facebook page. Politics is a touchy subject so I won't say anything one way or another. I know nothing about this person but I think this quote is great. I don't even know if I have the quote totally right but it was something like this:


"Some people use change to promote their careers. Others use their careers to promote change."

Sarah Palin

Lyrics, yet again.

Ok I know I post a lot of lyrics but I am a big poetry, quote, and music person and so I just have to share things that stick out to me. I like this song a lot because of the lyrics and she is a good singer too. It just kind of reminds me to be patient and trusting and take each day at a time.

One Step At A Time- Jordin Sparks

Hurry up and wait
So close, but so far away
Everything that you've always dreamed of
Close enough for you to taste
But you just can't touch

You wanna show the world, but no one knows your name yet
Wonder when and where and how you're gonna make it
You know you can if you get the chance
In your face as the door keeps slamming
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you're getting all kind of impatient waiting

[Chorus:]
We live and we learn to take
One step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly
Or falling in love
It's gonna happen and it's
Supposed to happen that we
Find the reasons why
One step at a time

You believe and you doubt
You're confused, you got it all figured out
Everything that you always wished for
Could be yours, should be yours, would be yours
If they only knew

You wanna show the world, but no one knows your name yet
Wonder when and where and how you're gonna make it
You know you can if you get the chance
In your face as the door keeps slamming
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you're getting all kind of impatient waiting

[Chorus]

When you can't wait any longer
But there's no end in sight
when you need to find the strength
It's the faith that makes you stronger
The only way you get there
Is one step at a time

Bored-I never thought I would say that

Here is one of those dumb surveys that I really don't like but I am working overnight and need to stay busy. Feel free to re-post or not, I don't care either way.

1. What time did you get up this morning? 3 PM- I work nights so it's not because I am lazy
2. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? The Dark Knight
4. What is your favorite pastime? Baseball/ other sports
6. What is your middle name? Marie
7. What food do you dislike? Fish
8. What is your favorite CD at moment? Viva La Vida-Coldplay
9. What kind of car do you drive? Saturn
10. Favorite sandwich? Turkey on wheat, tomatoes, lettuce, cheese, oil and vinegar
11. What characteristic do you despise? Lying, being undependable
12. Favorite item of clothing? sweats
13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Africa!!
14. Favorite brand of clothing? American Eagle
15. Where would you retire to? Hawaii
16. What was your most recent memorable birthday? I have no idea-probably my surprise birthday party at McDonalds when I was 15. haha That isn't very recent though
17. Favorite sport to watch? BASEBALL
18. Farthest place you are sending this???
19. Person you expect to send it back first? Not sure
20. When is your birthday? soon
21. Are you a morning person or a night person? Night
22. What is your shoe size? big
23. Pets? my puppy Mollie is with my parents but I miss her a lot, Nirvana is a good cat and i miss him too
24. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us? I graduated last week but you already knew that
26. How are you today? grand
27. What is your favorite candy? sour patch kids!
28. What is your favorite flower? Gerber Daisy's
29. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to? Dec 25- Christmas! and Jan 23
30. What is your full name? you probably already know
31. What are you listening to right NOW? kids snoring at work, and LOTR playing in the background
32. What was the last thing you ate? ice cream sandwhich
33. Do you wish on stars? Yes
34. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? electric pink
35. Democrat or Republican? I understand both parties views but I lean democratic
36. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Melani
37. Favorite soft drink? i dont really drink soda
38. Favorite restaurant? Olive Garden
39. Hair color? Blonde
40. What was your favorite toy as a child? Cabbage Patch Dolls, Barbies
41. Summer or winter? SUMMER!!
42. Hugs or kisses? both, but mostly hugs i guess
43. Chocolate or Vanilla? depends
44. Coffee or tea? neither
45. Do you want your friends to e-mail you back? I don't care
46. When was the last time you cried? when my sister showed me the slide show she made for me for my grad
47. What is under your bed? a duffle bag i think
48. What did you do last night? worked
49. What are you afraid of? death-not me dying but others, and crazy stalkers/rapists
50. How many years at your current job? 3 years at the job I just left, 4 days at my new job
51. Favorite day of the week? Sat and Sun
52. How many towns have you lived in? 6
53. How many people will you send this too? none
54. How many will respond? i don't know

Still alive and kicking!

Well I'm sure if anyone actually reads this (which I kind of doubt anyone does) they are wondering how everything turned out with my post-graduation plans and all. Well I will attempt to update you now, considering the fact that I am working in the middle of the night and need to stay awake somehow. I don't want to go into too much detail on here because I am sort of paranoid about creepy stalkers and such. I graduated last week and it was great to see some of my family. My parents, sister, grandparents, and two aunts and uncles came out. We had a great time and it was fun to be able to introduce my family and friends to each other. We had a great BBQ with everyone and it was a really good turn out. My cousin was amazing in planning and coordinating everything with my mum and it was so fun. Graduating was neat but it was very hot and I thought I might pass out in my itchy robe and hat that was too small.

Well I got offered a job before I graduated and they wanted me to start right away but I told them I couldn't because I had graduation and I needed to work the week of the 18th at my current job because it is our busiest of the year. They were very flexible with me and so I started here on Monday. I work as a counselor for troubled teens. I already love it and feel like this is really where I am supposed to be. I already find myself getting attached to the kids which is hard because their stay at this facility is quite brief. I am working mostly overnight shifts which is hard but hopefully I can get used to it. I just love working in the day with the kids. It is kind of ironic because this job was last on my list of the ones I wanted-mostly because of the hours. I am working over 60 hours this week because they had me working everyday this week plus I worked my old job a few hours too. The work schedule here starts on a Sat but I started on a Monday so with my training I ended up being scheduled to work everyday. It is totally fine though because I don't have a ton else to do and I generally enjoy working lots as long as I am able to still have a social life.

I moved apartments this week too which was also an ordeal but everything worked out wonderfully. I lived at my roommate's brothers' house for a week because we couldn't move in to our apt right away. Her grandparents let us keep some stuff in their garage and I also kept some of my stuff at a friend's apt. I was so stressed all summer about finding an apartment and a job and it is nice to have this resolved. My new apartment needs some cleaning and the showers are disgusting but mostly I like it and am so grateful to be living with one of my best friends. It would so much harder if she wasn't there.

All in all, life is good and I am just amazed at how everything has fallen into place. As stressed as I was, I kept saying that I knew everything would work out if I did my part. I am so grateful for the blessings I have seen and for being able to draw closer to the Lord as I prayed for guidance and direction. I am overwhelmed at the love and support from family,friends, and coworkers and will hopefully be settled in my new ward, apt, and job quickly. I hope everyone is doing well. Sorry this is so long and boring.

some great lyrics!

These are great lyrics for anyone who is having a hard day or just because. I love this song!

The Heart of Life

I hate to see you cry
Lying there in that position
There's things you need to hear
So turn off your tears
And listen

Pain throws your heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
No it won't all go the way it should
But I know the heart of life is good

You know, it's nothing new
Bad news never had good timing
But, then your circle of friends
Will defend the silver lining

Pain throws your heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
No it won't all go the way it should
But I know the heart of life is good

Pain throws your heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
Fear is a friend who's misunderstood
But I know the heart of life is good
I know it's good

John Mayer-Continuum

I'm still alive....barely

Yes I am still alive and kickin' although sometimes I am not sure how. I figured since it has been almost a month since I have written I should update everyone even though I'm pretty sure most people don't really read this. Well first off, I worked 10 hours today and am pretty pooped but the day went by fast. I have had one job interview thus far and have at least two more this week. Finding a job that could potentially be a career is proving to be one of the most stressful things I have undertaken thus far. Some days it seems like the life has been sucked out of me because I currently work full-time, am planning a graduation, making housing arrangements, and still trying to keep a normal social life. I love being busy so most days I don't mind but occasionally I realize how exhausted I am. The weekends have been my saving grace. Anyway, I will write again hopefully soon to tell you about my new job. Hope everyone is doing well!

just for fun...

I saw this on a friend's blog and thought it would be fun.

What I was doing 10 years ago: I was 11. I was probably very excited to start young women's. All of my brothers had just left the house and I am sure I was dealing with that adjustment.

5 years ago: Sixteen- I was going into my junior year of high school and probably excited about dating and driving. I was probably doing basketball workouts all summer and preparing to attend the city of joseph pageant in Nauvoo for the last time.

1 year ago: I was twenty. Living at Glenwood with Kellen, Mandi, Melani, and Yara. I was just working and enjoying my summer with friends.

Yesterday: I did laundry, went on a bike ride to the river with Kayla, went to the mall with Kayla, took a nap, and went on a date.

5 favorite snacks: popcorn, ice cream, sour patch kids, fruit, fruit snacks

5 favorite books: BOM, Trust in Jesus, Screwtape Letters, Princess Academy, How to Kill a Mockingbird

5 fave places to run away: I don't do this a lot but... my room, my car, nature, my parents, florida

5 bad habits: staying up too late, gossiping, avoiding boys, sleeping in late on Saturdays, ignoring certain phone calls

5 things I would never wear: mini skirt, thong, bikini, stilettos, fish net

5 pet peeves: selfish people, liars, people telling me what to do, people correcting other people's opinions-the beautiful thing about opinions is that they are not right or wrong-it is just a point of view, people doing stupid things that affect other people

5 things I enjoy: sleeping, eating, reading, music, sports

5 favorite t.v. shows: Cardinal's games, The Office, LOST, Gangland, College Bowl Games

Update

Well I guess I should have updated this and said that I am ALL done with school! It is such a weird feeling but I don't think it will really feel any different until the fall. I am excited to see what the future brings but I will miss my current job a lot. It has been so great! I got a letter yesterday and that was exciting. Those of you who know me should know what why I was exctied about this...
Anyway,I am really hoping and praying that all of my family can come out for my graduation but one thing after another seems to come up but I am not giving up hope yet. I just want my whole family to be together because it has been awhile. Life is just so busy! Anyway, I should mention that I LOVE the new Coldplay cd so much! It is very different and might seem odd to some but it is so great! I have yet to find a coldplay song that I don't like. Here are the lyrics from one that is really great. I think they are good. The song is called Lost.

Just because I'm losing
Doesn't mean I'm lost
Doesn't mean I'll stop
Doesn't mean I will cross

Just because I'm hurting
Doesn't mean I'm hurt
Doesn't mean I didn't get what I deserve
No better and no worse

I just got lost
Every river that I've tried to cross
And every door I ever tried was locked
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off...

You might be a big fish
In a little pond
Doesn't mean you've won
'Cause along may come
A bigger one
And you'll be lost

Every river that you tried to cross
Every gun you ever held went off
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the firing starts
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off…

I don't know but I just really like these lyrics a lot!

long day, but good

Today I worked from 8am to 6:30pm. It was a long day. I am pretty exhausted but the day was good and went by pretty fast. FHE was fun, we drew with sidewalk chalk and now we are going to go to a bonfire. I am tired but happy. Life is good.

ALMOST DONE!

I only have two days of class left and one day of finals. Can you believe I am almost done? I can't! It is a bittersweet feeling.

I might be back....

Hello!! Well as you can probably tell, this blog started put as one for a class. My English class a year ago required me to write 3 blog entries a week on different topics. I don't really want to take the time to go back through and delete all of those so they are still there but I don't really recommend reading them...they are grammatical and boring! Well anyways, I am going to try to update this kind of frequently but I don't know much about it so it may take a while. A lot of my family/friends have blogs so it will be a good way to stay in touch.